The Blog
Here’s where I share thoughts on the work of moving toward our biggest lives and baddest selves.
Your Growth is Off-putting, Pal
A recent coaching conversation accessed an old memory and floated it to the surface of my mind. It was of a long-ago friend, someone I met at work during what is now referred to as a gap year. “You’ve changed since you started college,” she said to me a couple of...
Behaviors can be Bad; People are Always Complex
A person in my inner circle is being bullied at work. She’s relatively new to the team and when she brought in her signature high standards and courageous willingness to invite people to reach for them with her, those who preferred the status quo of eeking by got a...
Our Best is Inevitably Imperfect. Dammit.
I can’t tell you exactly what alchemy happened when I was on the TEDx stage in Floyd, Virginia in 2013. I stepped on nervous and excited. I had a moment of utter blankness while the hundred people in the audience held their breath and the however-many people watching...
13 Perfectly, 100% Okay Relationship Options
This month marks four years since I left my marriage to a wonderful fella named Rob. I have written almost nothing about the whole divorce thing for two reasons: It’s equally his story and I’m not looking to compound his hurt I haven’t wanted to open myself up to the...
Am I outraged or am I just sleepy?
Some years ago, a study was done that followed around 5,000 parole hearings. The researchers were curious to discover trends in decisions to grant parole or not. They did, indeed, find a strong correlation and while you might think it was to how regretful the...
You’re Always Going to Annoy Someone
Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. - Marianne Williamson I was rinsing a dish to put it in the dishwasher this morning when I heard one of my gremlin voices...
I Get Fat in Greensboro
This past weekend, Theresa and I visited my family and I noticed something that I’ve only cued into consciously in the last few years: I get fat when I visit my family. I don’t mean I put on a lot of weight due to my mom’s yummy cooking and the splurges I allow myself...
Boundaries, Kazoos, and Inherent Value
Last week, I made an argument for creating boundaries by way of the movie Gremlins: Avoiding getting the adorable mogwai Gizmo wet meant that Gizmo didn’t have to go through all the hatching pain and that humanity didn’t have to suffer the creation of evil mogwais...
The Importance of Dry Mogwais and Thoughtful Boundaries
I don’t know if you know this but not only are gremlins what a lot of us call the critical inner voice, and not only was that what the Royal Air Force blamed for mysterious mechanical issues in WWII aircraft, but it’s also the name of a 1984 movie. Really! Okay, you...
When Small Talk Leads to Wedding Bells
Over the weekend, I met a friend for breakfast while visiting my mom in Greensboro. We went to my go-to local joint for catching up with someone or another over omelets and home fries. I’m there rarely enough that though it is always the same server, she doesn’t...
